Swiming Pool (2003) is not at all what it appears to be. Critics are split. There are some things I submit as fact.
1) The nudity from the breathtakingly beautiful and sexy Ludivine Sagnier is plentiful and gorgeous.
2) The camera work and lighting is flawless, as is production design.
3) Both Sagnier and Charlotte Rampling showed great acting ability, conveying much of the plot through expression.
4) The camera was also used as a player, where shot selection conveyed extra information.
Most everyone likes a good surprise ending, and only the hopelessly young mind seeing the mature Rampling doing full frontal. So why do people split in this? It is slow moving , it is character driven, rather than plot driven, the pace is very even, and there is really no clever dialogue. In fact, most of the dialogue could be inferred from the images and the acting. I was entranced. I had no idea where this film was going, and, when it finally reached the end, I had to think before I knew where it had ended up. I suppose what entranced me was the characters, and there was nothing wrong technically to jar me out of being involved with them. This is in the C to C+ range, but is higher on my personal appreciation list. I will watch it again. For more clues about the actual plot, read Scoops review.
"Angel of H.E.A.T."
Angel of H.E.A.T. addendum. Before removing this from the drive, I checked the "slide show," and found very nice full frontal of Marilyn Chambers, but presented in such a way as to make it hard to reuse. I believe these were shot to convert into a title sequence.
At any rate, Here's Marilyn.
|Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)
The Pawnbroker (1964):
The Pawnbroker, now 40 years old, in B&W, and very
dated in technique, is probably best remembered for its daring:
In an era when The Sound of Music was consider an
Oscar winner, The Pawnbroker went after heavy issues related to
survival, pain, guilt, and memories too unbearable to face. It was
about a holocaust survivor running a pawn shop in Harlem, a
miserable, sad man dead to the world around him. Certain events in
his current life trigger a haunting by the once-buried memories of
how his wife and children failed to survive the European graveyard.
Director Sydney Lumet shot a lot of the action in actual Harlem
streets, giving the film an authenticity and grit uncharacteristic
of the films of its time.
In an era when the Hays Code and the Catholic Legion
of Decency still held control of the nation's filmed morality, The
Pawnbroker dared to show quite a bit of nudity. In response, it was
condemned by the Legion, despite its tone of gravitas about solemn
subject matter, and the absolute necessity for the nudity. (Seeing a
topless prostitute stirs the pawnbroker's memories of his wife in
the concentration camp, and we are watching through his P.O.V.
That clearly was the best way to tell the story with maximum
impact.) This official church vilification meant, of course, that I
had to see the movie. What better recommendation could a 15 year old
boy have than a condemnation by the Pope himself. That HAD to be
hot! Well, I did get to see some breasts during a time when filmed
breasts were impossible to find, and I was at an age when I wanted
to see them, but I surely had to wade through a lot of depression
and pain to get there. It almost made me feel too guilty to look.
I think the Pawnbroker was the second film I ever
saw with naked breasts. The first was an Italian comedy called
Boccaccio '70, which somehow managed to make it to Rochester New
York with some nudity, probably on the strength of the noteworthy
directors who collaborated on that modernized Boccaccio anthology
(DeSica and Fellini, to name a couple).
The Pawnbroker is not as good a film as its
reputation. The characters are stereotypical, which left the film
trapped somewhere in limbo, between a legitimate art film and a
pedantic TV drama. The corny background music is often horrifically
inappropriate for the somber goings-on. The general quality of the
story and acting are no better than best TV dramas of the time,
except for a remarkable Oscar-nominated performance by Rod Steiger
in the title role.
Steiger lost the Oscar. It seems impossible to
believe when viewed with the eyes of our current consciousness, but
there was a time when a great performance about a holocaust survivor
lost to a comical portrayal in a Western genre spoof. (Lee Marvin in
Cat Ballou). Yes, Virginia, that could and did happen in 1965. It's
hard to imagine an Oscar today being handed to Leslie Nielsen for
his work as Frank Drebin, however brilliant that might be, while
Sean Penn and Daniel Day-Lewis frown from the audience, but
... well, these things go in cycles, and that was a time when the
culture's biorhythms were very different from today's.
Movies from Shiloh:
Shiloh sent in some winners today
Cristina Ricci and Charlize Theron doing that whole
lesbo thing in Monster, the film which should earn Charlize an
Oscar. No nudity from Ricci. Nudity from Charlize, but she's 30
pounds overweight and uglied up. The quality is not bad at all,
considering that it's a long clip with sound and is only 1.9 meg in
More of Kerry Fox in intimacy. (1,
4) Not the BJ, but lots
of VERY explicit nice-nice in clips that are pretty good quality,
but only 316x140 in size.
You might want to look at this one first (hint-hint):
Fourth Annual Weblog Awards Nominate your favorite
weblogs for the Bloggie awards to be presented at SXSW
Interactive. You could nominate, for example, Other Crap (OtherCrap.com), in
five or ten categories, and/or you could nominate sites that actually
deserve to win.
We now return to our broadcast:
Diana Ross will accept a plea bargain. The Arizona
authorites will allow her to plead guilty to driving under
the intoxication of her own glorious celebrity.
- Here's the trailer for
Shaun of the Dead, a British zombie comedy.
Lots of Elisha Cuthbert Glam Pictures
R-rated clip from The Girl Next Door with Elisha Cuthbert.
No nudity, but plenty of nasty talk and thought.
MILLER HIGH LIFE COMMERCIALS MAY BECOME TV SHOW
Former President Bill Clinton has been tapped as the next
possible Lord Warden of the Cinque Ports, Britain's oldest
military honor. Who is more deserving of an honor
associated with war heroics? Ol' Bawdy Murphy. Ol' Sergeant
- Quick, which President
"No President has ever done more for human rights than I
have". James Madison? Lincoln? Roosevelt? Jefferson?
You're gonna need a lot more guesses.
- She's so ugly ... Remember
classification systems? Can you tell us what a "two-bagger"
Here are some women who have put a bag over their heads so
you can fuck 'em.
Bush administration is expected to order as soon as next
month the first step in setting up databases on all air
passengers, to be used to color-code each air traveler
according to his or her potential threat level. Steve
Buscemi has already protested being Pink.
Trojan Horse Poses As Windows XP Update
"Space aliens aren't visiting Earth to conquer our planet,
nor are they here to pass on to mankind some
society-altering universal wisdom. They're simply stopping
by to pick up Krispy Kreme donuts!"
Iraqi info guy back on TV. Rumor has it he will play
Fred Sanford in the Arabic-labguage version of the popular
Woman wants Chink's Steaks, Philly landmark, renamed.
Also wants Billy Bob's Honky-Tonk renamed to Billy Bob's
White Person Tonk.
Dell and H-P lend support to Blu-DVD that can hold up to 4
hours of high definition TV.
- Tara Reid's layout inthe
Thank God! New Jersey finally has a state fruit. Nathan
Lane moved across the river?
Saddam with a winning lottery ticket! The same WWN issue
also informs us that aliens are here on earth solely to get
Prince Charles send Ozzy a bottle of scotch as a get well
gift. He also sent Courtney Love a half-kilo of heroin,
and sent along some complimentary hookers to Charlie Sheen.
"I am aware that Mr Sheen isn't sick" said the Prince, "but
who doesn't appreciate some good, free 'tang"?
- Centuries ago, Samuel
Johnson pointed out that patriotism is the last resort of
The White House takes off the gloves against O'Neill -
charges treason. They must be pretty damned worried,
because they're already on the last resort. "Oh,
sure, everything he said is true, but he's a traitor for
exposing classified information - so it doesn't count."
- Here is the trailer for
A Cinderella Story. Syrupy teen romance starring Hillary
Duff and Stifler's mom.
- Here's the HQ trailer for
Welcome To Mooseport. Small town guy competes for a job
and a woman against the ex-President of the USA (Gene
Orang-utans 'may die out by 2025'. That precise estimate
has to be the silliest claim ever - since they have a forty
year life span, and many of the ones alive now will still be
alive in 21 years, even if they fail to reproduce. Still,
the danger to the species is real, and this is Asia's only
ape, so read the story.
MovieJuice Diary: Ten Favorite Movies of 2003. For the
record, I agree with his high placement of the overlooked
Big Fish, and I second his belief that it will still be
watched years after the Oscar nominees are forgotten.
(Excepting Return of the King, of course)
Iowans Deluged in Run-Up to Primary. Although this is
from Fox news, it is quite an interesting article.
ACLU Backs Rush Limbaugh's Privacy Rush Limbaugh and the
American Civil Liberties Union don't agree about much, but
they're in accord that the conservative radio commentator's
medical records should be off-limits to prosecutors.
Phoenix critics crown 'King,' also honor Ben Kingsley, Naomi
Screenplay Review: The Weather Man (Nic Cage, Michael
FilmJerk.com - The Early Report for January 12, 2004
A few skateboarding tips you may want to ignore!
Whatever you do - do NOT tell Al Eingang to go fuck himself
"Gay Boyfriend" song. Strange and bizarrely off-key, but
A Guide to Flaming. No it's not instructions on
beginning your career as a female impersonator. It's your
guide to internet arguments.
Note to People's Choice Awards organizers: Ask Jim Carrey if
he wants a hosting gig next year. I'm surprised that he
hasn't been asked to host award shows. He is the best
nominee/winner EVER. I'd like to see him win an Oscar just
to see his acceptance speech.
- The trailer for
Torque is now online. (Stunt-driven cycle action movie
with Ice Cube.)
Seven films nominated for the "best achievement in make-up"
Stoner Woman Tries To Use "Get Out Of Jail Free" Card
Wacky labels earn awards A warning label on a 5-inch
fishing lure that sports three steel hooks advises that the
lure is "Harmful if swallowed". PETA is currrently teaching
fish to read.
- It's nhot too early to
think about a Valentine's Day gift - like
The Humanure Handbook
Clemens shuns retirement, signs one-year deal with Astros.
Survivor Fever - Survivor All Stars "All of the elements
for big success are there" says media analyst Bill Carroll
of the Katz television group. "It's like being able to have
Babe Ruth, Joe DiMaggio, Mickey Mantle and Derek Jeter all
play together." CBS executives are so high on the show that
they'll premiere it February 1st in the prime spot after the
Oops - 'The Lord of the Rings' Wins the Box Office Turns
out that the Big Fish guys were a bit too optimistic about
their projections. They sort of told a fish story.
A senior Vatican official has criticized a priest who's been
lined up as a contestant on Italy's latest Big Brother show.
Big Brother director, Giovanni Modina said:''The priest in
question came across very well in his screen test."
Umbrellas For Dogs - you can also get a matching one for
Pontillism for the new millennium - portraits made with bar
codes. They are amazingly good. He must have spent weeks
making these things.
The man who has confessed to killing Swedish Foreign
Minister Anna Lindh in September with a knife says God told
him to do so. Man, the Lord of Hosts is sure more
specific than in the old days. Used to be He had ten very
general commandments, and he didn't mention anyone by name,
like "Do not covet thy neighbor's wife, even if she is Inger
Stevens, that really hot Swedish chick on The Farmer's
Daughter". Now the Lord is telling Pat Robertson the precise
details of the 2004 election results, and telling this
Professor Plum guy to kill the Swedish Foreign Minister, at
3600 Stringbergsgata, between 7:00 and 9:00 on Tuesday, with
a knife, in her conservatory, and get in by using the key
under the third potted plant.
Citibank is NOT sending out notices asking customers to log
in and verify their accounts. It is yet another internet
identity theft scam.
Best fiction of 2003. I notice that they didn't pick
Cheerleaders in Chains.
InFlash.com presents "Cartman Undercover"
Australia may put koalas "on the pill" to halt population
boom. The hard part is getting them to time their
ovulation cycles. It's still easier than training them to
Police in central India are having to deal with a rise in
buffalo rustling. This has spurred a whole new genre of
rootin'-tootin' buffalo-rustlin' Westerns for Bollywood.
"Please to surrender, for I am finding you to be a generally
ornery sidewinder. If not totally ornery, you are most
certainly at the upper end on the ornery scale."
- Tired of Holiday Inn?
Here's where you want to stay on your next vacation.
The International Guild of Professional Butlers
- Latino Review has a script
- Trailers are on line for
The Big Bounce, a crime/comedy film written by Elmore
Leonard, starring Owen Wilson and Morgan Freeman.
archives. May also include newer material than the ones above,
since it's sorta in real time.
to submit a URL for inclusion in Other Crap
are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.
- The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the
review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
- If there is a white asterisk, it means that
there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined
there might be something else of interest.
- A blue asterisk indicates the review is written
by Tuna (or Junior or Brainscan, or somebody else besides me)
- If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too
ashamed to admit it.
|Gorgeous 'caps of the 90210 bad girl topless and in undies in love scenes from "Blindfold: Acts of Obsession" (1994).
|The Spanish babe and Tom Cruise's girlfriend showing off her lovely breasts in scenes from one of her very first movies "Jamón, jamón" (1992).
|Following "The Cruiser" connection...Let's take a trip back to the 1983 movie "All the Right Moves" and take a look at Thompson showing all 3 B's in her very first nude scene.
|The former "West Wing" co-star topless and being seriously groped in a love scene from 1994's "Little Odessa".
Lick and Zottoli
|All the usual B's, pseudo-sex and a 3-way scene from "All for Lust" (2003).
|The young Skinemax babe topless and gettin' it on in scenes from the "Maid Service" episode of the late night series "Hotel Erotica" (2002).
Mia Zottoli and
Mia Zottoli and
Mia Zottoli and
|Mia is a tad insatiable as she bares all in several lesbo scenes from "Visions of Passion" (2003).
||The young co-star of "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" showing off some very nice cleavage for the poster of her upcoming movie "Eurotrip" (2004).
|Señor Skin catches the Munroe baring her robo-hooters and showing some far off rear nudity in scenes from "Freddy Vs. Jason" (2003).
|Pat Reeder www.comedy-wire.com
Pat's comments in yellow...
LUST HAS BEEN MALIGNED
It's His Passion - The Sunday Times of London reports that philosophy Prof.
Simon Blackburn of Cambridge University is campaigning to have lust removed
from the Seven Deadly Sins. Oxford University Press commissioned books on each
of the sins, and Blackburn's says lust has been wrongly condemned for centuries
by old men and Puritans, when lust, if reciprocated, leads to pleasure and
should be reclassified as a life-affirming virtue. He said we don't condemn
thirst just because some people are drunks, so why condemn lust because it can
get out of hand?
If you're lustful enough, it NEVER gets out of your hand.
Could happen: in America, we've already reclassified gluttony as a virtue.
I'll bet this is the only one of the seven books that's a bestseller.
There's been no movement on this because people are too slothful.
Needs More Aging - The Neuzeller Kloster Brewery of Germany has developed
"Anti-Aging Beer," which they plan to sell in grocery and drug stores. They
claim it contains added ingredients that slow the aging process. But they may run
afoul of a German law dating to 1516 which states that anything called "beer"
can only be made from barley, hops, yeast and water. A company spokesman
insisted that Anti-Aging Beer "tastes like beer more than it tastes like anything
Well, aside from urine...
The extra added ingredient: Vasoline Intensive Care Lotion.
How can you look younger when you've got "bitter beer face"?
Drink enough Anti-Aging Beer and you'll get an "Extreme Hangover."
BULLIES DON'T HAVE LOW SELF-ESTEEM
Born Rappers - A UCLA study of nearly 2,000 sixth-graders found that all the
"child experts" are wrong: schoolyard bullies don't suffer from low
self-esteem. Psychology professor Jaana Juvonen said that in fact, bullies have high
self-esteem, show no signs of depression or loneliness or anxiety, feel good
about themselves and are often psychologically healthier than "well-adjusted"
kids. They are also popular and considered "cool" by their classmates, who
respect them for their dominance and strength.
And because if they don't, they're dead.
See? The Bush foreign policy WORKS!
Bullies are also wealthier, because they have everyone's lunch money.
So bullies don't need therapy, they just need a good pummeling...Whoever
would've suspected THAT?!
The theory that bullies are unhappy and have low self-esteem was created
by a lot of psychologists who used to get routinely pantsed as kids.
STARS TOO SKINNY FOR LANE BRYANT LINGERIE SHOW
What Yo-Yos - Bad news for men who like "big, beautiful women": the Lane
Bryant plus-size fashion chain has canceled this year's lingerie show because it
was too hard to find celebrity spokesmodels, what with Camryn Manheim, Queen
Latifah and even Anna Nicole Smith all slimming down. A Lane Bryant spokeswoman
said, "We applaud them, but how do we find a role model?"
Just postpone it a few months; Anna Nicole will be back.
Renee Zellweger will pack on 40 pounds if you pay her enough.
In Hollywood, the women on "Friends" are considered "plus-sized."
The fat Queen Latifah had removed from her breasts weighs more than most