The Punch Poll. The results of the "punch line" poll were kinda weird. Humor is subjective and personal, but I don't even think the winning entry is very funny, and it's a really obvious line. "I'd ban breast implants". I think people voted for the thing they agreed with most. Interesting results, but I'm not sure I'll repeat that experiment. Here are the results:

I have learned over the years that a lot of what passes for humor is simply saying stuff people agree with. The legendary Mort Sahl was fond of pointing out that he was the darling of the liberal set when he used to ream out Ike. Then, when Kennedy got elected, and Sahl zapped Kennedy just as viciously and just as humorously as he had zapped Ike, he found himself virtually unemployable. I find the same thing. You long-timers know that I have attacked Dan Quayle, Bill Clinton, Steve Forbes, and Al Gore with equal savagery. They are all inherently funny to me for various reasons, and my sense of humor is the same no matter which side I write about. But many people who think I'm a riot on their side of the fence jump on me if I dump on their favorites. I don't see it that way. A good laugh is independent of belief. I like some of the things I make fun of, but that doesn't mean they aren't funny.

I learned from this poll that people really, really hate Pauly Shore. The poor schmuck isn't even around much any more, and people still hate him as much as ever. According to IMDb, he played Lenny Bruce in some unauthorized Hefner biopic last year. That must have been something to see. I guess I liked him best as Iago in that version of Othello which starred Patrick Swayze in blackface. The Blackface I understood, I guess, but why did he play Othello as a woman?

Speaking of punchlines, I thought this was a great one from Pat Reeder, the professional gag writer who wrote Hollywood Hi-Fi" ----- "Sunday in Parma, the lead lost his voice in the first act of Aida, but fellow tenor Alberto Cupido was in the audience and was coaxed out of his seat to fill in. Thank God Bill Shatner wasn't in the audience."

Note: that semi-nude calendar of the U.S. track and field girls is now available at I haven't seen anything from it yet.

Members Bonuses- Better than Chocolate

a Better than Chocolate Maggie is a 19 year old girl whose mom and brother are coming to move in with her because of a family tragedy. That would be difficult for anyone, but it is made more challenging by the fact that she is a lesbian, that she has not yet told her mother, that she just met her new partner, and that the four of them will be cramped into an apartment with one bed.

It's a cute story, which really would have passed totally unnoticed if the script was identical but the lover was a guy. Of course, the same-sex angle adds a little spice to it. The most interesting character in the movie is their friend Judy, a biological male but a psychological lesbian. I guess I'm too unsophisticated to get that one. Isn't being attracted to women an important part of the definition of being a "normal" man? If he wants to make love to women, why does he need to become one? Oh, I don't know. I guess life is complex. It doesn't matter. It's a sweet-natured, well-intentioned flick that doesn't have any mean bones and manages to develop some interesting, realistic, and well-rounded characters.

The two lesbian lovers do a lot of nudity with body parts only, so you'll enjoy the rental even more than indicated by these 'caps. I almost never cap that kind of headless scene. I restricted myself to the ones where the owners of the body parts were identifiable. By the way, I thought the little redhead, Karyn Dwyer, was absolutely adorable. She's not a "name", but perhaps she will be.

Karyn Dwyer

Cristina Cox

Incidentally, the two new releases yesterday (Lake Placid and Mystery Men), had no nudity at all. Both are offbeat comedies, and I enjoyed them both. Most reviewers hated Lake Placid (Ebert gave it one star), but I thought it was a perfect Cormanesque horror-comedy movie, in the tradition of Humanoids from the Dep and Creature from the Haunted Sea, except that the monster really looked like a monster instead of like guys in silly suits. The interaction between the humans is quite good. Of course, Corman loved to fill his movies with nudity, and this movie had none.

Mystery Men is a very high-concept comedy about "super" hero wannabes who really don't have very substantial powers, but have to rescue the city when the real superhero is taken out of action. There are a lot of very good moments. I love the dumb powers possessed by the heroes: one is the master of cutlery, for example, although his partners point out that he could be more helpful if he used knives rather than spoons. The art direction is stylish, gothic, and murky, in the style of Tim Burton. I liked it. It has some moments that go on too long and just aren't funny, but I thought the overall good concept made it a fun movie to watch.

Members Bonus

One Fish, Two Fish
Tuna capped a classic. There's absolutely no flesh in "Three Days of the Condor", but it is possibly the best of the liberal-paranoia films of the Redford-Beatty era, and featured Redford and Dunaway in their primes.

(#1, #2, #3, #4, #5)

Variety from Blinky's runway today

Estella Warren (#1, #2, #3) Jen Dawson (#1, #2, #3, #4) Kate Moss Heather Payne

Aesthete is here, and it's not even Sunday. He has one of my favorite little movies, as measured by nude scenes. Oh, I really like Helen Slater, and she gets my vote for sexiest a cup.

(#1, #2, #3, #4, #5, #6, #7, #8, #9, #10, #11, #12, #13, #14)

Yesterday: Emma. (#1 , #2 , #3 , #4)

Page Three Gold is Corinne Russell from 15 August, 1990.

+ Ever wonder what the Playboy, Page Three, and other softcore models do when not modeling for Playboy or the British tabs? Fred does. Fred, or as he is known in the ancient Elventongue, "Frodo", specializes in "outing" the harder action from these ostensibly wholesome girls. Today's comments:

"Since fitness models seem to be popular now, I thought see if there were any pictures of well known fitness models demonstrating their workout routine. I was able to find these photos of Leanna Scott and Devon Michaels getting physical. Then there's the obligatory after workout shower, taken by Devon with April Hunter on stage in Las Vegas. I want to thank Hannes for posting the pics of Gail McKenna. I'm looking forward to future posts.". (Scoop Note: no need to look forward. Just look downward a few inches.)

Leanna (#1, #2, #3, #4, #5, #6, #7) Devon (#1, #2, #3, #4, #5, #6, #7) Devon&April (#1, #2)

++ Here ya go, Fred, a couple more of Gail Mckenna from Hannes. She has her legs open in #2 - is that the only one of it's kind? The last two are lovely frontals.

(#1, #2, #3, #4, #5)

Big batch of all-new vidcap storyboards from Helcrom
  • Shannon Elizabeth in "American Pie"
  • Shannon Elizabeth in "American Pie"
  • Shannon Elizabeth in "American Pie". This one is a single frame enlargement.
  • Anne Heche in "The Wild Side"
  • Victoria Jackson in "Casual Sex"
  • Lea Thompson in "Casual Sex"
  • Rene Russo in "Thomas Crown"
  • Rene Russo in "Thomas Crown"
  • Jane March in "The Color of Night"
  • Jane March in "The Color of Night"

  • Donbun New vidcaps
  • Asia Argento in "New Rose Hotel"
  • Griffin Drew in "Intimate Sessions: Lucy"
  • Caroline Key Johnson in "Intimate Sessions: Celeste"
  • Caroline Key Johnson in "Intimate Sessions: Celeste"
  • Some porn babes:
  • Lexy Lovar (#1, #2, #3, #4, #5)
  • Anna Amore (#1, #2, #3, #4, #5)
  • Dominique Costeau (#1, #2, #3, #4, #5)

  • And now for something completely different. Various collages of the nudity at Woodstock 99! Cool stuff, nmd. Enjoyed it.

    (#1, #2, #3, #4, #5, #6, #7, #8)

    Naked chick singers From M@
  • Nina Hagen
  • Hagen
  • Hagen
  • Sarah Brightman
  • Wendy O Williams
  • Wendy O Williams

  • More
  • Six from Don Juan. Anne Lockhart in "Joyride"
  • Melanie Griffith in "Joyride"
  • Melanie Griffith in "Joyride"
  • Marina Sirtis in "The Wicked Lady"
  • Marina Sirtis in "The Wicked Lady"
  • Louise English in "The Wicked Lady"
  • Brigitte Zeh in "Doppleter Einsatz" (RolandXox)
  • Teresa Langley in Dream Master: the Erotic Invader (Snowblind)
  • Loretta Pflaum in "Der Hahn is tot". (Celeblover) Ja, verstehe. Leider ist mein Hahn schon viele Jahre tot.
  • Saskia Vester in "Der Hahn is tot". (Celeblover)
  • Five Sonja Martin scans.
  • Sonja Martin
  • Sonja Martin
  • Sonja Martin
  • Sonja Martin
  • Click Here!