Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)

Junior is out of town on business. I'm holding the fort for a couple of days or so.


Its mighty close to the time for the annual year-end poll and article about the best nude scenes of 2002. It isn't time to vote just yet, but please review the nominees below. If I have missed any or mistakenly included scenes that belong in a different year, write me at Help out with foreign films, as well, if you are aware of them.

Monica Bellucci in Irreversible
Salma Hayek in Frida
Heather Graham in Killing Me Softly
Selma Blair in Storytelling
Rebecca Romijm Stamos in Femme Fatale
Michelle Williams in Me Without You
Kate Winslet in Iris
Kari Wuhrer in Spider's Web
Shannon Hart Cleary in The Attic Expeditions
Emily Mortimer in Lovely and Amazing
Milla Jovovich in Resident Evil
Diane Lane in Unfaithful
Kim Basinger in 8 Mile
Maria Bello in Auto Focus
Nicole Kidman in Birthday Girl
Portia deRossi in Women in Film
Erin Daniels in One Hour Photo
Maggie Gyllenhaal in Secretary
Mary Mara in Stranger Inside
Isabelle Huppert in The Piano Teacher
Monica Bellucci in Brotherhood of the Wolf
Rebecca Romijm Stamos in Rollerball
Amanda Peet in Igby Goes Down
Kathy Bates in About Schmidt
Maria Tornberg in Super Troopers
Angie Everhart in Sexual Predator
Angie Everhart in Bare Witness
Shannyn Sossamon in 40 Days and 40 Nights
Claire Harmon in Last Orders
Summer Phoenix in Esther Kahm
Dominique Swain in New Best Friend
Anna Lopez Mercado in Y Tu Mama Tambien
Rie Rasmussen in Femme Fatale
Lenor Watling in Talk to Her
Elena Anaya in Talk to Her
Elena Anaya in Sex and Lucia


Other crap:


  • Scoop - I had e-mailed you a few months ago saying I had upgraded my browser to Netscape Navigator 7.0 (w/Mac OS 9.1) but in doing so, I found all of your jpg photos would crash upon loading and I would get a message saying the photo could not load because it contained errors. It was happening with several other similar sites also. Fortunately I had a  MS Internet Explorer browser as a back up that I used to access your site, but this was a bit inconvenient. Good News. I reported the problem several times to Netscape and they have just released Netscape 7.01 for Mac, which repairs the previous problem.  If anyone else has reported this problem you might pass on the info. Thanks and keep up the super work on your website
  • Scoop- HEADS UP FYI: I just saw a promo for the local PBS affiliate showing the all-star Broadway  revival of "The Women" on Sunday night, taped live on stage.  I don't know if they're going to show it uncut, but I seem to recall that Jennifer Tilly had a nude bath scene in it, and most of the other women ran around in skimpy lingerie.  Sounds like your kind of Broadway entertainment. 
  • Scoop -  finally rented Scorpion King, and am having trouble getting through it due to constantly hitting the Slow/Pause/Repeat button on my DVD.  The amount of skin shown by Kelly Hu is amazing. For one thing, there must be some great out-takes out there somewhere.
    Here's my take on the "pubic" flash. 
    • 1. Standing next to the Rock before getting on the camel - this was after they had left the city.  It does appear to be pubes shown slightly from the side. The only thing against that is the scene lasted long enough, I think someone on set would have noticed.
    • 2.  The nightime scene where Kelly and the Rock are fighting has one part where she whirls around enough for her costume to show a dark delta shape which appears to be under the robe that she was wearing. But... this appears to be a "pubic patch" because it is much larger than the dark area that was noticeble in the camel scene.  Also, in most of the previous shots, such as leaving the city with the Rock, where you could see the robe was just tucked between her legs, there was no larger pubic patch worn.  The best one is probably as she "mounts" the Rock to give him the breath of life.  When she settles, her costume is pulled away slightly and there definitely seems to be pubes showing.
    • 3. In the fight scene between them, he throws her (or a double) to the ground, and she spreads her legs very wide as she lands.  There is a thin, dark area shown, but even the pause/step is so blurry I can't tell what I'm looking at.  I've also found what I'm pretty sure is a nipple slip, but its so unclear as to be hardly worth the trouble.  It is after the breath of life, when he tosses her off of him. As she rolls toward the fire, she flings her right arm away and I'm pretty sure her right breast comes out.  In pause step, you can see not only most of ther chest but what appears to be an erect nipple outlined against the firelight.  What makes me pretty sure this happened, is as the other character comes over to see if she's OK, you can see him reaching for the edge of her shirt, as if to pull it over the exposed breast, before the cutaway to the next scene.  I've watched this over and I'm pretty sure it's there.  Too bad they didn't give us an R or Unrated version and stop all this nonsense.   (written by "E" )


Here are the latest movie reviews available at

  • The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
  • If there is a white asterisk, it means that there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined there might be something else of interest.
  • A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Lawdog or Junior or C2000 or Realist or ICMS or Mick Locke, or somebody else besides me)
  • If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.

"Gold Bird"

Gold Bird (2002) is the infamous Japanese video of the naked Rumanian gymnasts that has become a hot topic in the Fun House. It appears to have in depth interviews with each of the three women, and bios of each, along with the main presentation. The reason I say appears is that they are speaking Rumanian, and the subtitles are in Japanese (as are the menus). The main presentation has each of the three women, Lavinia Milosovici, Claudia Presacan and Corina Ungureanu, performing a floor exercise, a vault, a balance beam routine and one on the uneven bars. First, they do each routine in some sort of workout clothes or a bra and panties, then perform the same routine in nothing but a thong, after which, we see slow motion instant replay of the most exciting movements. There is a running commentary in Japanese.

It is amazing what a generous pair of breasts will do during a dismount from the balance beam, or during a vault. I tried to include some frames of each women with their breasts in unusual positions, although there was a lot of motion blur on the DVD. It was slightly light, but not at all noisy. The DVD is all region, but, as I recall, was not especially cheap, and is only available from Japan. The gymnastic routines were VERY simplified. For instance, there were no tumbling runs in the floor exercise, but it was a good chance to see three nice bodies in motion. This is my first Naked Rumanian Gymnast movie, but I am guessing this is a great example of that genre, so C+.

Scoop's note: GREAT STUFF! Naked Romanian Gymnast movies should be a genre. In honor of Japan's love for these girls, the next installment should be Godzilla vs the Naked Romanian Gymnasts. Tuna reports that there will be more tomorrow - full frontals this time!

Thumbnails (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

Lavinia Milosovici ( 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30)

Corina Ungureanu ( 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30)

Claudia Presecan ( 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30)


Sonya Kraus in "Talk, Talk, Talk"

Claudine Conradi in a Spiegel TV special (1, 2)

Jasmine Tabatabai in Die Mediocren

Julia Thurnau in "Liebe, Luegen, Leidenschaften"

Karin Braun in "Weissblaue Wintergeschichten"

Maria Schrader in "Meschugge"


Today we catch a peek at Marciee Drake(1, 2, 3) in "The Toolbox Murders". Marciee shows us boobs while changing her blouse.

Then we move on to Susan Almgren in "Twin Sisters" (1, 2, 3 ), the first one she shows some boob, although it is a very dark scene, the other two are just a little leg action. 

Wrapping it up today is Cameron Diaz in "Feeling Minnesota" (1, 2, 3, 4, 5), no nudity but she is just so damn cute.Caps 1& 2 could almost be called a "Babe in  Peril" sequence as a couple of goons convince her to show up for her wedding.

Got an e-mail from one of my two fans which read "hey, make your collages bigger", so  I did. Here's Lauren Hays in Hotel Erotica (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

...and here is a continuation of my re-scans. Griffin may not be the prettiest but in my opinion she had one of the prettiest, maybe charmingest smiles. (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)


Victims! (1985) is a grade-Z zero-budget sexploitation directed by Jeff Hathcock which drags the genre down to a new low. The movie is about four young women who go camping and get raped by some crazed serial killers. The four actresses in question are Ava Kaufman, Ann Richardson, Geri Schlessel, and Pam Richards and they have no other acting credits (but one may have been a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader).

On top of that their roles are not identified so let's refer to them as  brown-haired, dark-haired, short-haired, and the obligatory blonde.




Meatballs III (1987) is a Patrick Dempsey/Sally Kellerman summer comedy vehicle with no nudity by the lead actresses,  not even Shannon Tweed. Isabelle Mejias, who's Dempsey's love interest, plays a goth who in the middle of summer dresses up more than a nun. Various degrees of skin is shown by various uncredited/bit-part actresses. IMDB says Caroline Rhea has an uncredited role  as "beach girl #4" but she has not been identified  (can someone point her out from the unknowns?).




Here is some Isabelle Mejias skin from other movies:

  • "Fall From Innocence" (1988): in sexy outfit with blonde Pandora Richardson, then showing major cleavage in brassiere (dark), then tame lesbian scene with Patsy Quinn.
  • "Higher Education" (1987): more major cleavage,  partial breast exposure.
  • "Human Target" (1993) aka "Final Round" (as Isabelle Jamieson): sexy underwear scene. Unfortunately this is her last movie.


Judy Greer, the cute topless redheaded waitress in Adaptation, also has a topless scene in "Stricken" (1, 2)

Charlotte Gainsbourg, star of My Wife is an Actress, appeared topless way back in 1990's Il Sole anche di Notte (1, 2)

Charlotte Lewis in 1993's "Excessive Force"

Rae Dawn Chong did some thong action in 1998's Small Time. It was not really a good idea. (1, 2)

The oldest nude scene we have from Italian uber-babe Monica Bellucci is 1991's La Riffa. Here are some more from that film (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)

The rumor is that Kelly Brook, seen here, will be the next Mission Impossible chick

Anna Biella in Giula (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9)

Arielle Dombasle (1, 2) in an old issue of French Photo

Tera Patrick in Front Magazine (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

An oldie but goodie of Cindy Crawford

Three golden oldies of Stephanie Seymour, also from old issues of Photo (1, 2, 3)

Chyna falls mostly out of her top in public. Actually, I think it is supposed to look like that. Thanks to Squiddy for sending the pic.