"Mortelle Randonee"

Mortelle Randonee (1983) is a French noire detective thriller, but a very odd one. This genre is heavily dependant on the personality of the detective, as he is the one we are to relate to. Beauvoir, The 'Eye' (Michel Serrault) is not a classic movie detective. He works for an agency, badly botched his last assignment, and is being given anther chance by is boss. He is obsessed with a daughter that he was denied access to when his wife divorced him. He has a school class photo she sent, and each year he gets one guess as to which girl is his daughter.

The case is a simple one. A rich Belgian family wants to know more about the young woman their son is keeping company with. The Eye sees her dispose of the young man's body, but suspects that she is his long lost daughter, based on absolutely no evidence. Rather than file a report, he follows the girl through most of western Europe on the pretext of catching up with the young man and returning him to his family. He watches her do her black widow routine over and over, and becomes more and more protective of her. All of this leads to a very French ending that I will not give away.

The young girl is played by an 18 year old Isabelle Adjani, who shows breasts in two scenes, and spends the rest of the film looking amazing. Who could blame The Eye for becoming obsessed with her? There is also a stripper who shows breasts in a short scene. IMDb readers score this 7.6 of 10 (IMDb calls it Deadly Circuit, a more or less accurate translation of the title). It was nominated for five Cesars. Admittedly, I love a good whodunnit, but this is nothing like the classic detective film. The new spin on the genre was interesting, and the portrayals by the leads were wonderful, making this well worth the watch. Considering that it took place all over Europe, you might imagine a "travelogue" feel to the film, but that was not at all the case. This is a C+, one genre lovers will want to watch.

  • Thumbnails
  • Thumbnails

  • Isabelle Adjani (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
  • Stripper (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)

  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)

    Hi, y'all. I'm taking a mini-vacation. I'll still be digging up some other crap every day, and will chip in with some movies as well, but not with my usual volume of verbiage and such! I didn't do any of my own caps today, but I did some collages from the ICMS caps. You'll see why his time was limited when you get to his section - awesome contribution - the best work we've ever seen on one of the all time great movies for celebrity nudity!

    Other Crap:


    Other Crap archives. May also include newer material than the links above, since it's sorta in real time.

    Click here to submit a URL for Other Crap




    Here are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.


    • The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
    • If there is a white asterisk, it means that there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined there might be something else of interest.
    • A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Junior or Brainscan, or somebody else besides me)
    • If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.


    Words, pictures, and vids from ICMS

    Scoop's comment: Here is the awesome work I mentioned! ICMS is da man! These caps are just about DVD quality, which is a real treat since this is an all-time nudity classic which has never migrated to DVD. These will pretty much replace everything in the Encyclopedia, so I added some borders and such to ICMS's raw caps and made some collages (below).


    Hi Scoopy !

    Castaway (1986) - Day 1

    "Castaway" (1986) was directed by Nicolas Roeg and starred Oliver Reed and a young Amanda Donohoe. They go to live on a deserted tropical island for a year and we witness the interactions and psychological happenings of the two. I really can't tell much more about this movie as I never seem to find time to watch the many DVD's I have lying around. I'm getting close to nervous breakdown here.
    What is remarkable is that in the IMDb women seem to like this film far more than men, but there weren't many women amongst the 448 voters. But when I add the 262 male voters to the 19 female voters the result is 281. Is there a difference of 167 votes here  ... or how does their system work?
    Anyway, most important is that Amanda Donohoe was naked very often in this movie. To be precise, nearly 22 miniutes out of 112 minutes in PAL. I recorded this full-screen version to DVD from digital satellite TV (BBC) in late 2003. The film is not available on DVD anywhere as far as I know. I have a total of 24 clips and 59 caps featuring Amanda in various degrees of undress, ranging from topless to buck naked. I think it's best to divide this material over 4 days, if that is fine with you.
    To be continued...

    A quick site note
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    Crimson Ghost
    NOTE: We currently have to do all of our movie files in zip format. Instead of viewing them online, save the zip files to your hard drive in the directory of your choice, un-zip and play from there.

    Today from the Ghost, part 1 of his coverage of an episode of the the late night series "Thrills".

    In this batch we have 'caps and clips of Nancy O'Brien (aka Nancy O'Neil aka Cynthia Boyd) going topless, full frontal and of course having some pseudo sex.

    • Nancy O'Brien (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11)
    • Nancy O'Brien zipped .wmvs (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)

    Jack Snow
    'Caps and comments by Jack Snow:

    Happy New Year to everyone at the Funhouse!

    Here's another batch of Euro-caps, this time with emphasis on Eastern European actresses.

    The German movie "Giacomo Casanova", just another biography of the Italian ladies' man, featured several daughters of the east in the nude.

    Moving on.....

    • On the third episode of "Heimat 3", Kazakhstan-born actress Larissa Iwlewa unwrapped one breast to feed her baby.

    • On the same episode, Constanze Wetzel showed the goodies while hot-tubbin.

    Finally, I here are some pics from the oldest movie I've capped so far, "Herrliche Zeiten im Spessart" (1967). Hannelore Elsner and Diana Krner, still well-known to German TV watchers, both showed very little skin. Elsner revealed some cleavage, Krner showed some ass. Best nudity in this movie was done by Monika Zinnenberg who showed one breast.

    'Caps and comments by Dann:

    "Wake of Death"
    I'm a big fan of Jean-Claude Van Damme, even given that most of his flicks are dumb actioners with poor stories and bad acting, but usually some decent fights. Jean-Claude may have taken one too many kicks to the head, though, because in this 2004 action adventure, he looks really beat up, and that's BEFORE the fighting starts.

    Plot is typical: guy's wife and family are killed by a Chinese gang. He finds gang. He kills gang. Wifey is avenged, although J-C is about the only one left alive at the end.

    Pure crap, and may be a real disappointment for Van Damme fans. I think, just like with Steven Seagal's newer stuff which has nose-dived into ultra-badness, these guys are just getting a little too old for the ass-kicking action genre.

    Kirsten Dunst Here's one more look at Kirsten's recent wardrobe malfunction. A little less exposure here than in the previous days' images, but there is still some nipple to be seen.

    Mimi Rogers
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19)

    Mimi recently took the number 2 spot in our Best Nude Scenes of 2004 reader's poll. Today, with a little help from Johnny Moronic, let's take a moment to look back at what must be her absolute best screen nudity. Here she is showing off her massive mammaries and rear nudity in scenes from "Full Body Massage" (1995).

    Anna Nicole Smith
    (1, 2, 3, 4)

    Everyone's favorite busty, white-trashy former Heffer in scenes from her softcore video, "Anna Nicole Smith: Exposed" (1998). In these 'caps we see her masturbating, gettin' it on, and about to do something to another woman's breast.

    Pat Reeder www.comedy-wire.com
    Pat's comments in yellow...

    Another End Of Year List Event - The English language mavens at Lake Superior State University in Michigan got more than 2,000 nominations for their annual list of words and phrases that should be banned for "mis-use, over-use and general uselessness." Among the 22 chosen were "blog," "sale event," "zero percent APR financing," "flip-flop," "you're fired," "I approved this message," the adjective "uber" applied to everything, "red and blue states," "erectile dysfunction" and "wardrobe malfunction."

  • Or in Tara Reid's case, an "uber-wardrobe malfunction."
  • John Kerry agreed that "flip-flop" should be banned, but then he changed his mind.
  • They disapprove of all these messages.
  • I'm sure those English professors would all love to permanently ban "erectile dysfunction."
  • Why are conservative states red anyway? Conservatives hate that commie color!

    May Contain Actual Elvis DNA! - Wade Jones of Belmont, North Carolina, snatched a plastic cup from which Elvis Presley drank water during a 1977 concert and kept it in a freezer for 27 years. He finally decided to sell the three remaining teaspoons of water on eBay after hearing about the Virgin Mary grilled cheese sandwich that brought $28,000. The winning bid for the Elvis water was $455. Jones said it wasn't as much as the sandwich brought, "but I'm happy." He said he was too attached to the cup to sell it, so the buyer just got the water.

  • He poured it into a #10 envelope and mailed it off First Class.
  • He can't bear to part with the cup: you can still smell peanut butter on it.
  • I wouldn't pay $455 for three tablespoons of moisture unless it was genuine, certified Elvis sweat!

    As many of you know, we have a book out called "Nine Hallmarks of Highly Incompetent Losers," which uses Comedy Wire stories to illustrate nine dumb mistakes everyone makes, such as "Never Plan Ahead," "Lose Sight of the Goal," and "Don't Communicate Clearly." It's become an annual tradition for us to list the top 10 losers of the year, and we wait until January 1, because it's never too late for someone to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory and end up on the list at the last minute. For instance, the Associated Press nearly made our list by naming their "Top 10 Stories of 2004" on December 20th. None of them featured the word "tsunami."

    This being an election year, there were many to choose from, and a lot of worthy competitors, from Pete Rose to Rod Artest to Courtney Love, failed to make the final cut. So these are truly the creme de la scum of loserdom. And the top 10 Losers of 2004 are...

    10. Donald Rumsfeld - Now the #1 target of Bush critics and dangerously low on armor, he made possibly his biggest strategic mistake of all at the end of the year: agreeing to stay instead of skedaddling like everyone else.

    9. Kobe Bryant - Prevailed in court with his claim that the sex was consensual, but even if that's true, when you tally up all the lost endorsement deals, legal fees and wife-mollifying jewelry, this could be history's first billion-dollar one night stand.

    8. Reality TV show viewers - Sure, one show was even called "The Biggest Loser," but if you wasted hours of your life watching it, you know you're a bigger loser than the contestants. Eating worms, going on blind dates and redecorating your house from Sears do not become scintillating entertainment just because they're on camera. There is a good reason why Ed Sullivan used to be the only talentless person allowed on TV, and why that was called "The Golden Age of Television."

    7. Michael and Janet Jackson - Unlike his nose, Michael has become a permanent fixture here, but his identical sister definitely earned her place beside him. Despite massive publicity from her Super Bowl "wardrobe malfunction," her CD was the bust that really flopped. If squeaky-voiced pop stars can no longer sell records by getting naked, Janet's could be the first of many careers that are over.

    6. Dan Rather - Mr. "Loser Hallmark #3: Don't Sweat The Details" ended his journalism career by falling for "30-year-old" memos so bogus, they might as well have been laser-printed on "Forgeries R Us" stationery.

    5. Ashlee Simpson - The new poster child for our "Loser Hallmark #8: Claim Talents You Don't Really Have." On "SNL," Ashlee proved she doesn't even have a talent for jig-dancing.

    4. 2004's Dumbest Criminal - Always a hard choice, but the honor goes to three would-be burglars in Gerringong, Australia, who repeatedly tried to kick open a glass restaurant door, not noticing that (A.) it was a sliding door, (B.) it was unlocked, and (C.) the restaurant was open and 20 diners were watching them and laughing their heads off.

    3. Martha Stewart - Bad enough she became the first domestic diva to go to prison since Julie Child knocked over a liquor store (or did we just dream that?), but the ultimate indignity was losing her prison's Christmas cell door-decorating contest. Oh, the inhumanity!

    2. John Kerry - What do you call a man who gets more votes than any other losing presidential candidate in history? You call him THE LOSER! So could we please stop recounting votes and get on with our lives?! To keep this list from being dominated by Democrats, Sen. Kerry shares his space with Tom Daschle, George Soros, the Dixie Chicks, exit pollsters, people who paid Michael Moore millions for crackpot conspiracy theories they could read for free on the Internet, Deaniac slackers who didn't realize they actually needed to show up somewhere and vote, anyone who needed therapy or threatened to move to Canada in November because Bush won, and countless others who are still in Ohio somewhere, counting. Move on, already!

    1. Ben Affleck - Last year he made "Gigli," so you'd think it couldn't get any worse. But Ben kicked off 2004 by losing J-Lo and releasing "Jersey Girl," and finished it with "Surviving Christmas." In between, he campaigned for John Kerry. Ben had a hand in so many disasters this year, we're amazed he didn't buy a time share in Fallujah. On the bright side, he is good at poker, a career where his talent for blank facial expressions actually comes in handy.