"Emanuelle in America"

Emanuelle in America (1976) is one of the Italian Black Emanuelle series. By this time, the premise was that Emanuale was a liberated woman with a boyfriend, had some occupation that took her all over, and she got laid in most or all of those places. By 1976, soft-core still ruled in most countries, but France was asking for some hard core content, so director Joe D'Amato not only added some oral sex and insertion, but a naked women jacking off a horse and a home brew 8mm snuff film.

Laura looked wonderful, which is what she is best at, and was stark naked through much of the film. She refused to do hard core. Based on the DVD interviews, I think D'Amato, whom she became good friends with over the course of several pictures, respected her for that decision.

Tonight, Laura Genser. Tonight, scores of other naked women from the film.

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  • Laura Gemser (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42, 43, 44, 45, 46, 47, 48, 49, 50, 51, 52, 53, 54, 55, 56, 57, 58, 59, 60, 61, 62, 63, 64, 65, 66, 67, 68, 69, 70, 71, 72, 73, 74, 75, 76, 77, 78, 79, 80, 81, 82, 83, 84, 85, 86, 87)

  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)

    Belly of the Beast (2003)

    It is almost film heresy to say this, but the last two Steven Seagal movies have been watchable.

    A couple of years ago, it looked like the plus-sized warrior was headed for a future as a fishing guide. He made three abysmal movies in a row (links to IMDb)

    1. Foreigner, The (2003)
    2. Half Past Dead (2002)
    3. Ticker (2001)

    But the last two, Belly of the Beast and Out for a Kill, are pretty solid straight-to-vid entertainment. Now don't jump all over me for praising the guy. These two films are not Raiders of the Lost Ark, by any means, but they do represent a marked improvement over those previous three. Seagal is also credited as a writer on this film, as he was in Out for a Kill, so he benefited from taking more control of his projects.

    In this one, Big Steve is a retired CIA operative whose daughter is kidnapped in Thailand. The bad guys weren't after Steve's kid, but her traveling companion, a senator's daughter. The plot workings are far too complicated, with various American factions bickering and various Thai factions maneuvering slyly. Everyone wants to blame some Muslim terrorists for the kidnapping, but Seagal's local knowledge tells him that is a cover story, and that something stinks of corruption and betrayal at the highest levels, among the people he used to trust the most.

    Steve and his former CIA partner, now a Buddhist monk willing to toss off the robes and do what it takes to help the Weighty Warrior, double-handedly defeat a small army of what must be more than 100 men. In fact, the monk defeats the entire army by himself, while Segal is upstairs going one-on-one with one guy who styles himself as the ultimate fighting machine.

    Well, as you might guess, Mr Ultimate is now Mr Penultimate, having been casually dismissed by Big Steve's Meaty Mitts.

    The action is not realistic, the plot is too muddled, the exaggerated faux-respect for Thai culture is grating, and the respect and loyalty themes are played out with way too much schmaltz, but the film has some cool fight scenes, good production values, and some exotic locales photographed well. The substitutions between Steven and his stunt man were done much more smoothly than in the last few Seagal pictures. Overall, it is a tolerable STV watch.

    I have learned not to show disrespect for Asian cultures in the presence of the Stout Sensai. At one point Ol' Steve is just bowin' and prayin' to beat the band, with some arcane Asian rituals. He has three little bamboo sticks with red ink on the tips, and he takes these sticks, and places them with the red tip downward, in a half-glass of water in front of a picture of his late wife. (Does Seagal always have a "late wife" in these things? ) He's really into the ritual, and he's arrangin' the angle of the little stickies just so, and I'm laughin', and you know what happened? He jumped right out of my computer and kicked my ass. Well, actually, it was his stunt double, but it hurt just the same. And then he made me whittle some little stickies and paint the tips red and arrange them in front of his wife's picture, but I accidentally got one of the sticks kind of a red-orange instead of red, so he had his stunt double kick my ass again, while he emptied out my refrigerator.

    Boy is he strict about those rituals.

    I was about to type "about those phony-baloney rituals", but I deleted the phony-baloney part. I suppose you think I changed my mind because I am a pussy and didn't want to get my ass kicked and my refrigerator raided again by Steve and his stunt double. But that's not the reason. I have an anti-ninja firewall now. The real reason that I changed my mind is that I realized that those rituals must have been genuine, because whenever he did them, the musical score would be some Susie Wong music followed by a resounding gong. A gong! You just don't get any more authentic Asian than that.

    There was one thing that didn't work in the fight scenes. Too many of the fighting effects were created during post-editing. In one scene, the Thai stuntman did an absolutely brilliant leap off a pile of lumber. He was poised with two swords arranged in a perfect balletic line in mid-air. Of course, it was obvious that Seagal was not really there at the time, but was simply striking a pose in front of a blue screen against an imaginary opponent who was to approach him on the ground. The two scenes must have been combined in post-production. Look at Seagal's head and eyes in the picture on the Movie House page. He is obviously looking nowhere near the attacker.



    • Charlie's French Cinema Nudity site is updated.




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    • The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
    • If there is a white asterisk, it means that there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined there might be something else of interest.
    • A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Junior or Brainscan, or somebody else besides me)
    • If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.

    'Caps and comments by Brainscan:

    Two little words....

    Jessica Alba. Nuff said.

    These collages come from Idle Hands, a decent enough little campy movie about a demonic mass-murderer who has taken the form of a detached hand. The hand gropes, which qualifies it to be the next governor of Cahleefournya. And it grabs and, apparently, it ties up the most beautiful woman in Hollywood. Sign me the fuck up!

    'Course we have us the problem outlined before by Scoopy Sr. as to how a hand could be threatening. Newton mechanics, with all its demands of fulcrum and leaverarm and torque, says a hand detached at the wrist should be able to do nada. But it's only a movie. I should learn to just relax.

    Nine collages. First fisrt is offered to show off Ms. Alba's face. THE modern Helen of Troy, this woman. In the other eight collage is a sequence that is progressively more revealing, leading to a bit of the nicest bum you might ever behold. Notice her co-stars hands. How did he kept himself from copping a feel? Heroic self-restraint? Either that or a door that swings in the other direction.

    'Caps and comments by Hankster:

    Today, we pay a return visit to Gabriella Hall in "The Erotic Misadventures of the Invisible Man".

    I just love this woman! Sexy, sexy, Sexy.

    Anyway here's Gabriella in various stages of dressed and undressed, showing breasts and pubes.

    Jaime Pressly
    (1, 2, 3)

    No nudity, but Pressly looks great in a bikini and other skimpy outfits in these collages by DeadLamb from "Pinata: Survival Island" aka "Demon Island" (2002). I haven't seen this, but I think the IMDb plot outline probably speaks for itself: "Teens trapped on an island are haunted by a demon hidden inside...a pinata."

    Beverly Lynne

    (1, 2)

    Natallie Moore
    (1, 2, 3, 4)

    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

    Kelly Wales
    (1, 2)

    Dragon takes a look at a softcore flick called "Wild Spirit". Plenty of breasts, and some of them are even real!

    Hudson Leick
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14)

    An AWESOME find by the Skin-meister! The Evil Calisto in topless scenes that are brand new to these eyes. The movie is something I've never heard of called "The Last Hand" aka "After the Game" (1997).

    Pat Reeder
    Pat's comments in yellow...

    Never-Neverland - Santa Barbara County, California, sheriff's officials say that Michael Jackson may face false allegation charges for claiming that he was manhandled by police who dislocated his shoulder and made him sit alone in a filthy toilet. They say surveillance video shows he was treated courteously, kept briefly in a holding room that's scrubbed daily, and that he chatted politely with cops, whistled, thanked them for turning on the air conditioning, and blew a kiss to the other inmates.

  • Across the hall in juvenile detention.
  • That kiss was the reason they put him in a holding room alone.
  • That's when he dislocated his shoulder...He blows very exuberant kisses.
  • They were even nice enough to turn on the air conditioning to keep his face from melting.
  • Michael doesn't know what manhandling is...He doesn't even know what woman-handling is.

    Why They Can't Afford Clothes - Domino's Pizza reports that in 2003, "Paris Hilton" was the number one fake name given by people ordering pizza delivery. People with "Bush for President" bumper stickers were three times more likely to order meat pizzas than people with "Dean for President" stickers. The night Saddam Hussein was captured was the biggest night for tips. And people who answered the door in the nude tipped better, with nine percent of them tipping over 20 percent of the bill.

  • Actually, those deliveries really WERE to Paris Hilton.
  • That wasn't a tip, it was hush money.
  • Well, it wasn't as if they could put the change back into their pockets.
  • It wasn't that exciting: people who order a lot of pizza should never be seen nude.
  • They figure it must be a fake name because Paris Hilton has obviously never eaten a pizza.