NOTE TO ALL: Scoopy Jr writes the bulk of the commentary these days, while Uncle Scoopy continues to add his daily column, Contact junior by writing junior@scoopy.com. Contact Scoopy by writing unclescoopy@msn.com. Contact Tuna by writing tuna@scoopy.com Send submissions to scoopy@scoopy.net

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"Vegas Vacation" (1997)

Vegas Vacation (1997) is easily the weakest of the 4 Chase/D'Angelo Vacation films from a plot standpoint. The family goes to Vegas to celebrate a huge bonus. Chase gambles everything he has, Wayne Newton hits on D'Angelo, Rusty falls in with some big rollers, and Audrey is brought out of her shell by her exotic dancer cousin. Quaid gives possibly his most likeable performance as cousin Eddie, and Christie Brinkley reprises her role from the first Vacation film as the girl in the red Ferrari. On the plus side, the video quality is easily the best of the three DVD transfers to date, and Las Vegas certainly has more than enough colorful locations.

While there is no nudity, D'Angelo shows a lot of leg and cleavage, as does Brinkley, and promising newcomer Marisol Nichols has some good pokies near the beginning. Critics were not kind, with Maltin at 2 1/2 stars and Berardinelli at 1 1/2. IMDB readers were also not impressed rating it 4.8/10. My opinion is probably colored by my fondness for Beverly D'Angelo, but I have seen a lot of films with higher ratings that were not as much fun to watch. US gross was a disappointing $36.429m. D'Angelo sings in this one, and sings well.

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  • Beverly D'Angelo (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14)
  • Christie Brinkley (1, 2)
  • Marisol Nichols (1, 2)

    "Wings of a Dove"

    Scoopy recently did a great review of The Wings of the Dove, and I have very little new to add. He feared that it seemed almost a "Merchant-Ivory snoozefest," and, indeed, it put me to sleep. It is beautifully photographed, lavishly set, and well acted, but did not hold my interest. What did hold my interest was the amazing exposure from Helena Bonham Carter at the end of the film. I used to think I was a breast man until I went to a nude bar. I discovered that night which part of a woman was actually my favorite. Take a good look at image 15 for a great view of my favorite part.

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  • Helena Bonham Carter (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18)
  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)
    I hope the other guys had better luck than I did, because I spent a zillion hours on two spectacular DVD's, but never saw one stray bit of flesh.

    In fact the two projects are related in a way. One is based on the ten commandments, the other on the seven deadly sins.

    The collector's edition of SE7EN is spectacular, one of the best dvd's ever. The film is completely remastered, and there is a second disk just for the extras. But no flesh.

    The other one I looked over is Kieslowski's 10 hour masterpiece, The Decalogue. 10 hours of wonderful humanity, stark cinematic poetry, and profoundly realized moral dilemmas, but not one tit in the entire 10 fucking complex and masterpiece-filled hours.

    All kidding aside, these are two of the ten best DVD's of the year 2000. SE7EN is great because of all the extra work they expended to make this memorable film a collector's treasure. Decalogue, on the other hand, has no widescreen version, is a lousy dark transfer, and has no features at all, but it is just so thrilling to see all ten rarely-seen chapters assembled on a DVD set, that no serious film buff is likely to complain. Before this issue, I had only seen one of the ten, plus some excerpts, and I ended up watching them all.

    Comments by Mongoose:
    "2069 A Sex Odyssey" From 1974. A spaceship from Venus, a planet without men, lands in Bavarian lederhosen territory on a quest for sperm. The five lovely aliens have the assignment of infiltrating the local village and luring the men folk back to the mother ship so that they can have their seed pumped out by a giant sucking machine. The ladies have no concept of sex and are quite confused when they see it on TV.

    Yet another German flick from the 70s on VHS. AKA "Ach jodel mir noch einen," "Sex Charge," "Space Girls," "Stoßtrupp Venus - 5 Mädchen blasen zum Angriff," "Stoßtrupp Venus bläst zum Angriff" and of course, "Venus Raiders - 5 Girls Trumpet the Attack." Do I need to say it? It's great! Great looking women having sex and running around naked. And lederhosen, beer and felt hats too! Commander Sex Sex Sex is played by Nina Frederik (Nina Fredric on the video box), the other four are known as Number One, Number Two etc and are Heidrun Hankammer (Heidy Hammer on the box), Catharina Conti (Catherine Conti), Gerti Schneider (Gerti Sneider) and Alena Penz. This first pic has no nudity but introduces you to the young lovelies:

    Heidrun is the first to get laid. The first thing the women have to do is steal some human clothing so as to blend in with the locals. Here Heidrun is trying to figure out what underwear is. Then she gets boffed by the travelling underwear salesman.

    Note that post coitus, the sparkly make-up and shiny hair disappear, making them look like regular women. I liked the exotic space look better myself.

    Now the sharper amongst you may see a continuity problem here. Gerti is the second lass to have a run in with a human. Y'see, the community knows that the female French Olympic Ski Team is practicing in their neck of the Alps. When the locals spot the space ladies and their strange garb, they figure them to be the French Ski Team. Thinking that they're French women, the men believe it's OK to just rip their suits off and have sex with them. Gertiruns into an aggressive stable boy who does just that. He starts to rip her suit off and she protests that she will "freeze up" without. Nonsense! He ignores her and rips her clothes off and she freezes up!

    The continuity fart is that Heidrun just got finished making love naked in a Volvo with the windows half down and she didn't freeze. Granted, from the caps you couldn't tell the windows were half way down so you're forgiven for missing that. The stable hand takes the frozen body to the local doc who warms her naked body in a sauna. Gerti then begs the ethical doc to screw her. He resists for a couple of minutes then has at it.

    After Heidrun experiences the joy of sex, she can't wait to get back to the mother ship to share what she's learned with Commander Sex Sex Sex. No nudity here...just two women sucking tongue. The cap quality drops a bit here as well. Lovely ol' VHS.

    And a little nudity here. Heidrun munches on Nina's nips and then gives her head.

    Nina (Commander Sex Sex Sex) cannot stay in the mother ship with all of this interplanetary cultural exchange going on! Here she meets an Earth man and gets made into a women.

    Catharina Conti's a real looker but the movie was skimpy on her nude appearances. She did appear naked later, and full frontal as well, but they were faraway shots. No nudity here. Her Earth man likes blow jobs and here's a cute little scene of knockwurst munching in the local beer hall.

    The last three pics are of the big finale. All the women are now human and have lost that cool make-up that I liked so well. When they appear at the tavern, the locals want them to change into regular clothing (they still think they're French). To everyone's surprise, the girls oblige by stripping down right then and there! This causes a major Old West style Bavarian barroom brawl. Mostly Alena Penz in the first one. (10)

    All the gals are full frontal in this one (except for Gerti who is off with the doc somewhere). Catharina's bush can be seen in frame six.

    And the gals are spraying champagne and having a good ol' time.

    They all go on to marry Earth men and have little Earth babies. The rest of the collages (8 more) are on my site. These are the best of the lot though.

    Comments by RDO:
    Here's my take on a couple movies. 9th Gate was interesting, but it really bothered me that an alleged antique book expert would sit on a moving train with a glass of red wine in one hand, a cigarette in the other and a priceless volume open on the table in front of him. Seems to me a book that valuable should be handled only with rubber (or at least white linen) gloves, and probably in an air-conditioned vault.

  • Lena Olin, "The 9th Gate" (1, 2)

  • Emmanuelle Seigner, "The 9ths Gate" (1, 2)

  • Katrine Boorman, "Excalibur" (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

  • Cherie Lunghi, "Excalibur" (1, 2)
  • Blackshine
    Kate Moss
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7,
    8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13,
    14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19,
    20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25,
    26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31,
    32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37,
    38, 39, 40, 41, 42, 43,
    44, 45, 46, 47, 48, 59, 50)
    A bazillion scans of the the wafer thin super model.

    Looking for the nudity?...well then try the following links:

  • #3, 14, 21, 29, 30, 38, and 39
  • KZ
    A very nice collection of sexy scans. Only Anna Nicole show the goods (and you know what to expect there). The rest are lingerie poses and the like.

    Anna Nicole Smith
    Katie Price
    Tania Zaetta
    Sadie Frost
    Georgianna Robertson
    (1, 2, 3)
    and ...
    Esther Arroyo
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

    Great images of Miss Spain leaving very little hidden from the camera!

    Amanda Johnson
    (1, 2, 3, 4)

    A model in serious need of a gym membership. Not that she's plump or anything, but I don't think I've seen a model this "soft" looking since the 60's.

    Kim Iglinsky
    (1, 2)

    Topless poses from the model.

    Elizabeth Hurley
    (1, 2)

    Comments and images by The Night:
    Happy new Year all!

    About these pics from the movie "Shameless"...I now know now why so few people dare to cap these. The color is so messed up that getting a reasonable good color/quality pics is next to impossible.

    But still it's Liz, an god created woman.

    Catherine Wilkening
    (1, 2, 3)

    Full frontal images (including some views from the gyno-cam) from the 1987 French movie "Mon bel amour, ma déchirure".

    Olivia Brunaux Excellent topless vidcaps from ""Rouget le braconnier", by Touch.

    Megan Cale
    (1, 2, 3)
    Three mostly nude poses from her 2001 calendar. #3 has the clearest exposure, but there's nothing wrong with the other two!

    Nina Proll Topless exposure in scenes from the Austrian movie, "Ternitz, Tennessee".

    Penélope Cruz A follow up from yesterday...a second look at topless scenes from 1998's "La Niña de tus ojos" ("The Girl Next Door").

    Click Here!