LeMay and Serena Blanquelord (aka "Serena")
"What is this? 10 ... 9 ... 8...
7... 6... "
"Bo Derek aging"
Bo likes to tell that joke on herself. She turned 63
last year, and the film turned 40. I can't tell you
Bo is actually down to a 6 or lower these days, but I
sat next to her on a flight from Miami to Lima in 1996
or 1997, some twenty years after this film was
released, and she was still at least a nine. She was
40 then, but her waist was still extraordinarily tiny,
and she still turned every head when she walked by.
And not because she was familiar. I guarantee you that
the first reaction she inspired was "That woman is
gorgeous." The second was "By God - no wonder she
looks so good. That's Bo Derek."
I know this for sure because of something that
happened the next morning in my hotel. I was chatting
and sipping coffee with the guys from Mobil Peru while
we waited for our ride. Bo, who must have been staying
at the same hotel, slipped past me, touched my hand
and said, "Morning, Greg." The Mobil guys reacted
exactly as I described above. At first they wondered
how I knew such a beautiful woman in a city I had
never visited before. Then, when they saw crowds
gather around her, they realized it was Bo Freakin'
I told those guys absolutely nothing about how I knew
her. It was my only play. If I let on like I really
knew her well, they would have thought I was totally
full of it, which is not really a good way for a
consultant to start a relationship with a new client.
If I told them the truth, I would have looked like a
schmuck. "So, you sat next to her for six hours on the
plane, and made no effort at all to hook up later, or
even to get to know her?" The truth is that I
introduced myself, passed a few pleasantries, then
left her to her privacy while I watched movies and did
crossword puzzles. I didn't even know she was staying
at the same hotel. So, yeah, of course I AM a schmuck,
but once again this is not something I want a client
to know. So when they said, "That's Bo Derek," I said
"Yeah," shrugged my shoulders, and immediately asked
them a business question which required a detailed
That approach worked. By the end of the visit they
were calling me "Marques", short for "El marques de
los grifos." "Grifos" is a uniquely Peruvian slang
term. (I think it's unique. I've never encountered it
elsewhere.) In Peru it means "gas station" or "gas
stations" (the singular and plural are the same, like
"tocadiscos"). That referred to my profession, so I
was literally the Marquis of the Gas Stations. In
proper Spanish, however, the word simply means
"nozzles" or "faucets," and obviously can carry a
certain suggestive connotation. I was the guy casual
about his relationship with Bo Derek, therefore the
It was very kind of Bo to recognize me as she did!
Anyway, about the movie:
Dudley Moore's humor seems archaic now and the
entire film seems dated, but I still kinda like "10,"
and always have. Most guys over 40 do, because it's a
niche film about getting to middle age, and thus has a
tightly defined target audience. Men like it more than
women. Older men like it more than younger men.
Americans like it more than others. It's only rated 6.1
at IMDb, but if you are a 45+ year old American man, it
is probably a good bet. Even if you fit the pattern, you
should realize that this film is the cinematic
equivalent of what the Dudley Moore character writes for
a living - elevator music. 10 is pleasant, inoffensive,
and unchallenging. It has some gentle laughs, mellow
tunes, and sexy women. Above all, it made Bo Derek a
star and gave her A-list recognition throughout the
world, including Peru.
Tuna, my former Fun House
colleague, had some interesting observations:
"The story of the party guests has proven to be perhaps
more interesting than the film itself. Director Blake
Edwards hired porn superstars for the orgy scenes
figuring that they would be comfortable with the nudity.
They were all put up in a hotel suite, and the party was
so wild that their room service was cut off. At one
point, Edwards directed one of the male stars to get up,
meaning to get out of the chair he was in. The star
misunderstood what was supposed to be up, and started
spanking his monkey on set. When Dudley Moore related
this story during a Playboy interview, his girlfriend,
who was off camera, nearly stopped the interview she
laughed so hard.
Thanks to Celebrity Sleuth and many Funhouse members,
nearly all have been identified. Interesting to me was
the fact that so many people recognized exactly one of
the women, because that one was a personal favorite. And
no two people had the same favorite! The list reads like
a Who's Who of porn:
Here are the stars:
Constance Money (real name Susan Jensen),
star of the classic "The Opening of Misty Beethoven."
Annette Haven, a former nurses aide, who had one of
the prettiest faces in porn. She refused to do
Serena Blacquelord, usually billed as Serena
Candida Royale, who started Femme, a studio devoted to
producing films women would enjoy, too. My
favorite of the titles she released is called "Three
Daughters." I read an interview where she said she had
several more films in the cans, but there was no way
to make a profit releasing them. When porn made the
transition from film and adult theater releases to
video, the gross per film was much lower, and the
economics of creating a video version of her 35 mm
films just did not make sense. This same change from
film and theaters ended the golden age of porn, when
it looked like porn and mainstream films might get
close enough together to join hands."